by Debbie Brodsky, DMB Pictures, LLC/Video Storytellers
About 6 months ago, our extended family was on vacation together in Florida. My husband, an avid Syracuse fan, was excited to go to the Bowl game being played nearby one night, so some of us went with him. My parents stayed back at the hotel to be with our younger son Bryan. It was getting late, so my Mom told Bryan to go get ready to take a shower. He went into his room (from their attached room) and came back out dancing – buck naked. My Mom, feeling that he was a bit old to be dancing around naked at the age of 11, told him to “Go put something on!” He left the room and came back a minute later, still completely naked, wearing sunglasses.
I share this short story because it so aptly reveals the 
essence of who Bryan is – silly, fun-loving, quick-witted and always ready to get a laugh. It’s also a great example of one of the four categories I share with clients when helping them decide which stories to tell in the process of recounting their life story.
Many people feel overwhelmed when they begin the process of sharing their life story. There is so much to tell – where to begin? What do we keep in or leave out? What’s important to share? I’ve recently been working with several clients who have been challenged with those very decisions. They have so many stories to share and so much they remember. (And in some cases, so many other people who can add to their stories.)
I like to tell my clients to think of sorting their stories into one of four buckets:
- Family History – a story that gives the reader (or viewer, in the case of video) a better understanding about their family history – who they’re related to, where they came from, where and how they lived, what relationships were like between family members, etc.
- World History – stories that tell about the way things were at an earlier time that today’s and future generations would have no idea about or that have become obsolete. Learning about history through real people, especially ones you are related to, is a powerful way to understand and keep the past alive.
- Values/Family values – stories that share how you decided on something, chose a certain path, and what it meant to you. The turning points and obstacles in your life and how you handled them share what you value and what’s important. It’s also shares valuable life lessons and wisdom for future generations.
- A Person’s Essence – a story or anecdote that in describing the story, shares the essence of who the person is or was. By sharing what they did or how they reacted or handled certain situations, the story shares the true nature of their personality in some way. Here’s a video example of an “essence” story from one of my clients:
This is not to say that other stories aren’t also important, but if you have too many to tell, this is a great litmus test for sorting your stories and deciding which ones might be more important or warrant more time to tell. Try the bucket test the next time you are sorting through your stories.
If you still need help and are having trouble going it alone, tap into the resources here of this talented group of life historians who can help you!